When My Time Comes

Sometimes, I catch Hoarders www.aetv.com/hoarders/ and Hoarders, Buried Alive, www.tlc.discovery.com/videos/hoarding-buried-alive-tv/  on TV and I think how can it be possible to not notice how bad things are and that stuff is piling up? And what could make a person a hoarder--in some way-- to begin with? But then I realized, I do understand, in a way.

Because it was sometime after I watched the show that I realized I was having trouble letting go of my moms "stuff", as well. And I now understood how a hoarder could start hoarding after a death, or divorce as I could not give up a couple of boxes-- of things-- after my moms death in 2010. And I realized I'd been keeping her "stuff", as a way to hold on to things she'd cherished, to in some way keep her memory alive.

But at some point, I had to acknowledge she would never be before me again--in this lifetime--, therefore this "stuff" was just "stuff, excluding, of course, pictures, or family jewlery. And I don't want my daughter to have to make the painful decisions of what to do with all my things. So I've slowly begun to get rid of things that just sit around. Moms "stuff" as well as my graphic design, writing, and art books, and things that haven't been used in awhile. 

I really think that being honest about each thing, and whether I will use it or not, makes each decision easier, when deciding what to keep and what to get rid of. It's then I'm able to get rid of clothes just sitting on the hanger or shoes that haven't been worn in a bit. It actually makes me happy because these things are finding a new home and I know my own daughter won't have to face so many painful decisions of what to do with my "stuff", like I had to do with my own mom, when my time comes. So that makes it all worthwhile in the end.

The Vow--So Much More Than A Movie

I went to see a movie yesterday that made me smile, cry, and really think about love, marriage and words of wisdom, from long ago. That movie was: The Vow, http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/sony_pictures/thevow/. I went to the movie with the notion that it might be good, but it was so much more than that. It  was a movie of commitment, belief and not giving up even when things looked hopeless. I will not ruin anything--for those that haven't seen this yet--only to say this movie affirms the concept of love, and that fairytale endings are possible.

It really made me think about my own marriage beliefs. These beliefs started with my moms own comments about marriage, years ago. I always thought (before I married) why did mom always go beyond the call of duty for dad? Why did she go see movies (she didn't like) over and over with dad? Why did she always look at him with such love? So one day I asked her and she said, "Marriage is sacred. It is something you always work at. It's like a garden, you always weed it and make the man feel like the king of the household." This and "Honey gets your more than vinegar," were her secrets to a good marriage.

But regardless of my rolling eyes, I was quick to use her words of wisdom in my own marriages. And even if that was not enough, in that first marriage, seeing the happiness mom and dad had was enough to ensure I carried these same beliefs into my marriage--now. So moms words of wisdom served me well as I've done a lot of weeding and cupcakes and I'm sorry have brought about smiles a lot faster than any anger or show of stubbornness ever could.

So Channing Tatum's character--Leo-- and the love and belief he showed his wife--Rachael McAdams character--Paige--is really touching. It spoke to my own heart, and how special I feel marriage is, never to be taken for granted. I've read some reviews where Channing Tatum's acting is seen as bland, corny and the movie--The Vow-- targets just young men and women.  But I disagree with this. I think this movie targets any age range, any person, that needs to believe in love and that love can overcome anything we face in life.

So I think this movie would be good for young couples, those with a few years under their marriage belts, and even teens hoping for that love everlasting--though not for young kids due to nudity, sexual content. I know my mom loved my dad--with all her heart--until the day she died.  And it is this kind of love--a love everlasting-- that this movie brings to light. It is this fairytale that we all hope to find in our lifetime.

Reasons To Be Thankful

I was going to write about something else today, but decided to write about things that have made me thankful in my life. Since I think this can be a broad topic--as there is a lot to be thankful for--I will narrow it down--quite a bit.

I will start with my dogs, as they brought about these thoughts. Yesterday, it was time to take them for their rabies shots. They shivered up a storm on the way there, but never moved, never made a sound. When we got there, even though their eyes were opened wider than mine, at a scary movie, they looked at me with undying faith. Even as they were getting their shots they looked at me with love and trust. This made me feel thankful for having such wonderful dogs.

And I'm thankful for: the love of my family, the wonderful friends that I have, the fact that I was able to take my schooling online, and the joy I see in my daughter about the simplest things in life. It is through her joy, that I have so many times looked at life, and what we have around us, in a different way.

And maybe crazily enough, I feel thankful for the Internet. When I first got the Internet I was inundated with possibilities and stayed online for hours playing games, chatting and looking up things and finding out information.

But I learned, after the newness wore off, that the Internet is so much more.  It's not something to take for granted, and it's something to be thankful for too. Because I have encountered--online--so many people that have given freely of their knowledge and reached out to help others, some gaining monetary things, but so many offering help and advice for free. 

So it is my hope that the following links can be as useful to others as they were to me. These links are for free job offerings: http://www.pandahi.com/ , http://www.zaarly.com/ , and http://www.mediabistro.com/ .

I also found some sites with helpful Photoshop video tutorials. As I love graphic design--these really stood out. They were: http://www.pxleyes.com/ , and http://www.tutvid.com/ .

I also found two sites that I really appreciated for their creativity and thought that they would be good to have. One was:-- creative videos for all occasions, http://www.lodocinema.com/ , and the other free instructional art classes, http://www.5pencilmethod.com/ .

Of course, with Utube and endless sites offering free videos, the possibilities are endless, to learning  everything from screenplays to helping my daughter with her math.

So in conclusion, I think there are many things to be thankful for in life. Each thing, no matter how insignificant it may seem, brings us a reason to be thankful.  It might not make everyone feel the same way, but if it makes us feel thankful in our hearts, that's what matters.

Phishing Alert-Scams of 2011

I found myself the recipient, after checking my email this morning, of yet another scam. This time, supposedly from the BBB of Virginia. Which, of course, was untrue.This email scammer used something they call phishing to send out alarming, but false emails, using a company name and logo. So just for my own knowledge, about the current email scams concerning the BBB I did a search and found this link www.bbb.org/blog/2011/11/alert-phishing-scam-uses-bbb-name-and-logo .

I guess one's bound to get these emails, if you receive hundreds of emails, like I do, but it's pretty bad when you look at most emails-- suspiciously-- when your not sure of the sender or the subject line looks fishy. So I throw out all emails not clearly denoted, in subject line, and hopefully I've not thrown out an email from a friend who decided today to just put re: in the subject line. But with today's emails scams extreme caution is a necessary evil.

Since I know scammers, scam in many areas, including emails, I decided to see just what kind of scams people had come up with in 2011. Unfortunately, there were links to several scams. Some of these scams included: emails, Craigslist, online scams, tax scams, ACN scams, ATM scams and Norton Internet Security scams, just to name a few. If you'd like to find out more about this I've included a couple of links about some scams of 2011. They are: www.scambusters.org/top10scams2.html  and http://www.wptv.com/ (scams of 2011-search).

I hope this can be of use and helpful to you. And hopefully you can give a shout out, as I plan to, to friends, family, and associates and I'm sure they'll be appreciative, if they see this, especially if they were unaware of some of the scams playing out, not only in 2011, but continue to be a part of our everyday lives, now as well.

In The Blink Of An Eye

 My daughter reached a mid-way point in her life, yesterday.  She is no longer a child, but not yet an adult. It was a hard transition for me, though I should have seen it coming. I should have been prepared, as there was no stopping a birthday that was coming faster than a runaway locomotive. My daughter was excited, for days, about the coming of a birthday that was taking her toward adulthood. But I was dragging my feet as if trying to ward off bad news.

Last Friday, I guess I was dealing with it better because I got her her first, official trendy haircut.  More like a teenager, less like my baby girl.  She left the hair salon with short pieces, framing her face and pretty curls throughout the length, in the back.

I was so proud of her, and yet so sad.  My daughter's growing up. And someday, as with all kids, she'll spread her wings and fly.  High across the sky, drifting where the wind carries her.  Maybe towards college,  or with a husband to start a new home, or even to follow his or her career to a state far away.

I know she will go down the same path I did, as she becomes a teen, for it's each person's right to choose a path that makes us understand and grow. She will probably, as a pre-teen, wish for a car, and freedom to see her friends and go to the mall.  Then with a car, she will wish for a place of her own, and more freedom. Then college or a husband to complete the great circle of life, for that time of her life.

 And eventually, she will learn, that life is not always so much fun when responsibility comes our way. Such as myself, when I had my first home and was making four dollars and twenty five cents and hour, with no insurance, and could hardly pay my bills.  I quickly realized mom and the security and safety of my childhood home, filled with love and wisdom did not look so bad after all.

So I know my daughter will face a plethora of choices, as she goes through these changes, we all must face.  She will become a pre-teen, a teen and eventually a young lady.  And through all these changes she will roll her eyes at me, as I did mom.  She will talk back to her old mom, as I did mine, as well.  But even though I understand, she will be exerting her independence, it will be hard, as I know it was for my own mom.

And in time she will want to be with her friends, as mom, will be boring, and life out there will be so much more fun, as I guess I did with my mom as well. So what's coming for me?  A young girl, who will have a mind of her own, who will want to prove she doesn't need her mom.  Who will have to experience, so many things, before she understands what her old mom's nagging, through the years, was all about.

She will learn that life can be painful, that not all friends are what they appear to be, that that was not really true love, that money really can slip through your fingers, that we really do have to budget money and pay our bills first.

Someday, she, like I myself, will understand what a mom's worry is all about.  She will have her own child, and from the moment it's born she will try keep that child safe.  She will start by doing all for the baby.  Then the baby will become a toddler,who doesn't need anything. A little girl, who needs mom after all. A pre-teen- again- who doesn't need mom, as she's such a worrier.  A teen who think moms embarrassing. And finally an adult, who forgets mom for periods of time, life's so busy.

 And as life settles down, this child, who became a woman, will face the passage of time and the trials of raising her own child. And she will automatically look towards her own mom, for she knows nowhere else will she find better guidance, as grandma's already been down that same road. She will look towards her mom, not with rolling eyes, but seeking wisdom as she deals with her own child who, will too, grow up in the blink of an eye.