I wanted to say I'm sorry to anyone, that may have checked for new posts, periodically, only to find none. It's been a rough few months, with the death of several loved ones. Two of my uncles passed away, in close succession, then my beloved father passed away on the 2nd of February 2013.
Life can be hard, without experiencing the death of a loved one--but particularly when both your parents are gone-- as mine are-- making one feel adrift and alone. So it's been difficult, not only dealing with my dad's death, but with the total indifference-- I've encountered-- as I've gone through the painful process of taking care of things daddy was not able to do.
So I've decided to make my regular posts, in the weeks to come, but also DIFFERENT posts (from my norm) where I find sites with people that have overcome terrible loss--of any kind--and still they persevered. This will not only help me with my own loss, as time goes by, but hopefully it will show how we, THE PEOPLE, are strong. How we FIGHT to go on, do what we need to do, even when life is the HARDEST.
Look for the next post, though to be a promo for a friend of mine and his movie that I KNOW will one day see the big screen. And as a HUGE movie fan, I look forward to that. :-)
About Me
- Rogue
- I'm a SAHM who began writing, and not just thinking about it, in 2010. I thought graphic design was my future, but was surprised to learn that screenwriting was in my blood. I'm excited to say my first feature length is now being considered for optioning. Life's crazy sometimes, huh? :-)
Showing posts with label death. Show all posts
Showing posts with label death. Show all posts
Monday, March 25, 2013
Monday, March 26, 2012
For Genna
She had a cute little under bite, and sometimes I swear she'd smile, when given a dog treat. And I found it endearing when she acted shy--placing her paws on top of her head--as if to say, I'm so ashamed. She could be stubborn though-- for a little terrier-- and it was easy to envision the indifferent flick of a cat's tail, when she ignored a whistle and simply walked away. Yet, she was a constant companion, who followed us around the yard, chasing my daughter on whatever adventure she was on. So, it was with great sorrow, that I learned my dog, Genna, passed on today.
So today's blog is dedicated to my pet Genna, and a big thank you, to her. This is also an acknowledgement to other great dogs out there, for each dog, in whatever way they're there for us, show: unconditional love, loyalty, and an eager need to please, and give companionship that lasts until their dying breath.
I tried to decide what other kind of dogs to talk about, but I had such a hard time deciding, as there are so many great dogs out there. So I narrowed it down to just four types of dogs, that have helped us, in some way, throughout history. First, I think I'll mention the dog that would have helped my mom so much--if we could have afforded it-- as she lost her independence, two years before her death, due to blindness.
This, first dog--so helpful to man-- is a Seeing Eye, or Guide Dog. http://www.seeingeye.org/ . So often, since moms death, I've observed the guide dogs and have seen their kindness, calmness, and have been comforted by their unending concern for the visually impaired person they're helping. And I know, such a gentle dog would have been so much comfort to my mom.
Second, I want to mention some dogs I saw on a TV, awhile back. The dogs really touched my heart. They were, Australian Shepherds--or working dogs--who demonstrated great loyalty, patience, and persistence. www.en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Working_dog . I've rarely seen dogs as loyal as these dogs can be. They risk their own lives, to guard and protect the livestock, of their owners.
Next, these wonderful dogs helped during the war: History: The Dogs Of War. www.vetmed.ucdavis.edu/ccab/war.html . These brave dogs--like the K-9 units of the police--work alongside man, putting their lives on the line, in the call of duty,and as such should be celebrated, and honored for the dedication they give to their jobs.
And this last site-- from it's first paragraph-- showed what was most important about our dogs--before anything else, they are first, and foremost, our friends. In this way, my friend Genna, through her love, showed me how to give unconditional love. This site: What our pets teach us--click link to dogs on left side-- is: www.thepetwiki.com/wiki/What_Pets_Can shows a history of what dogs have meant to us, and how they've always been by our side, in some way.
But now, it's time to say my final goodbye to Genna. I acknowledge that my life will never be the same. For the loss of Genna, as with my other pets, over the years, is a pain, that's never forgotten. A tiny missing limb, that will never grow back. May Genna know, in some way, how much I loved her. For a little piece of my heart is gone, and will never be replaced.
So today's blog is dedicated to my pet Genna, and a big thank you, to her. This is also an acknowledgement to other great dogs out there, for each dog, in whatever way they're there for us, show: unconditional love, loyalty, and an eager need to please, and give companionship that lasts until their dying breath.
I tried to decide what other kind of dogs to talk about, but I had such a hard time deciding, as there are so many great dogs out there. So I narrowed it down to just four types of dogs, that have helped us, in some way, throughout history. First, I think I'll mention the dog that would have helped my mom so much--if we could have afforded it-- as she lost her independence, two years before her death, due to blindness.
This, first dog--so helpful to man-- is a Seeing Eye, or Guide Dog. http://www.seeingeye.org/ . So often, since moms death, I've observed the guide dogs and have seen their kindness, calmness, and have been comforted by their unending concern for the visually impaired person they're helping. And I know, such a gentle dog would have been so much comfort to my mom.
Second, I want to mention some dogs I saw on a TV, awhile back. The dogs really touched my heart. They were, Australian Shepherds--or working dogs--who demonstrated great loyalty, patience, and persistence. www.en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Working_dog . I've rarely seen dogs as loyal as these dogs can be. They risk their own lives, to guard and protect the livestock, of their owners.
Next, these wonderful dogs helped during the war: History: The Dogs Of War. www.vetmed.ucdavis.edu/ccab/war.html . These brave dogs--like the K-9 units of the police--work alongside man, putting their lives on the line, in the call of duty,and as such should be celebrated, and honored for the dedication they give to their jobs.
And this last site-- from it's first paragraph-- showed what was most important about our dogs--before anything else, they are first, and foremost, our friends. In this way, my friend Genna, through her love, showed me how to give unconditional love. This site: What our pets teach us--click link to dogs on left side-- is: www.thepetwiki.com/wiki/What_Pets_Can shows a history of what dogs have meant to us, and how they've always been by our side, in some way.
But now, it's time to say my final goodbye to Genna. I acknowledge that my life will never be the same. For the loss of Genna, as with my other pets, over the years, is a pain, that's never forgotten. A tiny missing limb, that will never grow back. May Genna know, in some way, how much I loved her. For a little piece of my heart is gone, and will never be replaced.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
She's Gone, Move On
Sometimes I feel better and other days the passing of my mom hits me all over again. It's taken baby steps just to realize that she will no longer be a part of my life. In my heart she still lives, and in my heart she will remain, so when someone told me the other day, "She's gone, move on", I think, how is it possible to be so cavalier about this? We can't just rip out what we felt about that person,they will always be a part of our life, our heart, our very soul.
Of course, I realize that each person in life sees the grieving process and the ability to move on in different ways, some move on with life at a pace that might shock others, others continue those deeds-started by their lost loved ones-, to continue bringing happiness to others, and others still remain in a state of stasis, a kind of suspended animation, if you will, until the world seems to kick back into gear again for them.
So in many ways -I guess you could say- I've remained in suspended animation. Oh I've continued with the day to day things, I've continued cleaning, cooking, homeschooling, socializing, my schooling, as well as writing, but the real me inside, the one that used to joke, give advice and worry about others-well that part seems to be out for an unknown length of time.
So, we each have to deal with death in our own way, but I don't think those that can move on so quickly, should expect those-still continuing to hurt-to move on at the same pace. We can no more rip out the pain we feel inside-at a moment's notice- than the sky can be lowered if we want to see the stars more clearly in the night time sky. It's just impossible. And besides, our loved one, so real in life, can't be made so forgettable, to others, just because they think we should have moved on by now. Never should we hear, "She's gone, move on."
So, in closing, I know life will go on for us, but each-dealing with death- in our own way. We, each, just continue on living like the mountains, strong and ever present, just in that little ledge on the mountain-we carry, in our heart-the memories, and the laughter, and the very echoes of that loved one-that will always hold a special place in our lives. This we never have to get over and move on with, this we keep close and always cherish.
Of course, I realize that each person in life sees the grieving process and the ability to move on in different ways, some move on with life at a pace that might shock others, others continue those deeds-started by their lost loved ones-, to continue bringing happiness to others, and others still remain in a state of stasis, a kind of suspended animation, if you will, until the world seems to kick back into gear again for them.
So in many ways -I guess you could say- I've remained in suspended animation. Oh I've continued with the day to day things, I've continued cleaning, cooking, homeschooling, socializing, my schooling, as well as writing, but the real me inside, the one that used to joke, give advice and worry about others-well that part seems to be out for an unknown length of time.
So, we each have to deal with death in our own way, but I don't think those that can move on so quickly, should expect those-still continuing to hurt-to move on at the same pace. We can no more rip out the pain we feel inside-at a moment's notice- than the sky can be lowered if we want to see the stars more clearly in the night time sky. It's just impossible. And besides, our loved one, so real in life, can't be made so forgettable, to others, just because they think we should have moved on by now. Never should we hear, "She's gone, move on."
So, in closing, I know life will go on for us, but each-dealing with death- in our own way. We, each, just continue on living like the mountains, strong and ever present, just in that little ledge on the mountain-we carry, in our heart-the memories, and the laughter, and the very echoes of that loved one-that will always hold a special place in our lives. This we never have to get over and move on with, this we keep close and always cherish.
Friday, December 17, 2010
To Go Back In Time....
Today I took my daughter to see a movie. We went to see Tron Legacy. I felt bittersweet as I saw the enjoyment my daughter showed while watching the movie. I felt this way because it brought back memories of my mom and the times we went to see movies over the years.
My mom passed away on the 15th of October of this year and not a day goes by that I don't miss her more, that I don't wish I could turn the clock back and redo some of the things we did. She did so much for me, from taking me on bus tours, to being there as a friend, an advisor, and she was one of my biggest fans- in all the things I did in life.
One of the final gifts my mom gave to me, before she passed on was the belief in myself, and my ability to write. She listened quietly to each thing I read-not a sound-and when I was finished there would be a slight pause, and then she would say that was really, really good.
Each time I passed an exam-with my school-she would again praise me, and then she would tell me she knew I could do it.
So as my daughter and I exchanged smiles during the movie, I wished that my mom could have been there too, sharing smiles with us- as we watched the movie.
I was watching a show tonight and one lady asked her daughter why she was staring at her for so long, the humor being that the mom wanted to do something without the daughter watching her. I laughed at this but it made me think, I wished I had looked at my mom more, I wish I had cherished each moment more that I had with her, because my time with her is now done.
I, therefore, dedicate this blog tonight to the memory of my mom. May you know that I love you mom. May you know that I miss you more than words can say, and may you give me your knowledge and your wisdom, so that I may continue to write and grow as a writer, so that someday I may achieve all that I hope to be.
To the memory of my mom.........
May 11, 1945-October 15, 2010
My mom passed away on the 15th of October of this year and not a day goes by that I don't miss her more, that I don't wish I could turn the clock back and redo some of the things we did. She did so much for me, from taking me on bus tours, to being there as a friend, an advisor, and she was one of my biggest fans- in all the things I did in life.
One of the final gifts my mom gave to me, before she passed on was the belief in myself, and my ability to write. She listened quietly to each thing I read-not a sound-and when I was finished there would be a slight pause, and then she would say that was really, really good.
Each time I passed an exam-with my school-she would again praise me, and then she would tell me she knew I could do it.
So as my daughter and I exchanged smiles during the movie, I wished that my mom could have been there too, sharing smiles with us- as we watched the movie.
I was watching a show tonight and one lady asked her daughter why she was staring at her for so long, the humor being that the mom wanted to do something without the daughter watching her. I laughed at this but it made me think, I wished I had looked at my mom more, I wish I had cherished each moment more that I had with her, because my time with her is now done.
I, therefore, dedicate this blog tonight to the memory of my mom. May you know that I love you mom. May you know that I miss you more than words can say, and may you give me your knowledge and your wisdom, so that I may continue to write and grow as a writer, so that someday I may achieve all that I hope to be.
To the memory of my mom.........
May 11, 1945-October 15, 2010
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